Top 10 Things to Do To Have Sex With Me Tonight

10. Instead of Facebook poker, try kitchen cleaning.

9. Take the kids to the park for an hour.
Tire them out.

8. Bring home dinner.
Doesn't have to be fancy.
Take and bake pizza, I don't care.

7. Pick up the bedroom.
It's hard to feel sexy while staring at your stinky socks.

6. Give me a sincere compliment.
Don't tell me I'm cute.

5. Bring me a cocktail and/or chocolate.
In a pretty glass. On a nice plate.

4. Get the kids bathed and tucked in.
Not one or the other. Both.

3. Rent a movie to watch with me. (And not that kind).
If we sense forethought, there may be foreplay.

2. Kiss my neck sans boner.
If I want one, I know how to get it.

1. Tell me I'm a great mother.