(Not) Doing It All

I have discovered that being the type of woman who can Do It All leads to Not Doing It At All. At least for me.

I'm a stay-at-home-mom of many small children who has done smidges of freelance work in the past. But I recently took on a large freelance project that has pretty much taken over all my spare time, and then some. Now, I'm squeezing in work all day long in between the home and childcare duties.

My husband hasn't changed his schedule. So when he gets home at night and flops on the couch and says he's tired...it's not that I don't believe him, but I can't help but think how much more tired and drained I am. Not only did I work too, but I did it while still keeping the rest of our lives running.

Resentment=not hot.

I've stopped exercising. I'm not sleeping well. I haven't been treating myself to anything except a bowl of ice cream at night before collapsing.

And, obviously, I haven't been having any sex.

I think that if I had to go back to work fulltime it would be easier than this. Working in a nice quiet office all day long would be relaxing in many ways, and we'd all settle into the groove. But this patchwork of home and family and work is not working, and the romance department received the most massive cuts of all.

I'm here to admit that I can't do it all, and when this job is over I will go back to being a plain old mom and wife (and lover) with more satisfaction (and hopefully a lot more lovin').