I think the number-one thing keeping me from having more sex is how tired I am at the end of the day. By the time I crawl into bed at 10 or 11 p.m., I have zero energy left for love.
And forget about morning sex with small children in the house.
The solution is timing: We need to get the kids down earlier and make sure we go to bed together as early as possible, when I can still keep my eyes open. Afterward, if I want to read a book or he needs to do a little work, fine. We'll be all the more relaxed while we do it.
One of my favorite sexy memories involved good timing. (It also helps that it happened before we had kids.) One Valentine's Day, I rushed to get home from work before the husband. I quickly prepared a tray of finger foods, wrapped it with plastic and popped it in the fridge. Then I took a bowl of strawberries and a bottle of champagne to the bedroom, changed into lingerie and laid in wait. When he got home, we enjoyed a twilight hour in the bedroom. Afterward we watched a movie together and ate the light dinner I'd already prepared. It was a brilliant, sweet, romantic evening, easily achieved with a bit of foresight.
I've been wondering if I can orchestrate something similar now, working around the kids. I'm going to think more about how I can time our evenings to maximize our potential in bed. (Step 1: Enforce an earlier bedtime for the kids every night. Sex or no, it will make our evenings nicer.)
I really love the idea of a light supper waiting in the fridge. And there's something nice about sex not happening so late at night that all I want to do is sleep.
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